That noob is TOTES jeal' about my hawt neko avi...

If this is the first thing you're reading off my blog, you should know that I hang at infohubs frequently--where 40+ year old gothicatz dudes and neko-vampires reign supreme and the noobs flow like wine.  There is almost NO instance where a noob (meaning they haven't progressed beyond the comb over hair and primless 3-piece suit), can approach one of the said GothiNeko vampires and recieve a favorable response.  Since when did recieving a compliment become so offensive.  At best, the noob will recieve a "...oh... thanks" or a more positive reply laden with sarcasm.  More commonly they will be shunned as a pervert and at least one gothidude will take it upon himself to use his brash uppercut that he keeps attached religiously.... like his currently invisible prim dick that you will see if you "highlight transparent".

It's true that a good number of new folk will turn out to be looking only for sex, especially if they are from south america.... for some reason.  But on the other hand, this guy with one pixel shoe and no hair might be the coolest person you have met in your 4 years of loitering around infohubs.  You will never know if you are close minded.  You cannot expect someone who has just downloaded and is playing SL for the first time ever to respect what you have come to believe are the correct ways of behaving in the game.

It is common for a younger person to act that way actually, in my opinion.  Not necessarily just because of immaturity or "ignorance", but because of social norms.  An example that comes to mind are dating websites.  My Dad joined eharmony and he openly talks about it with friends and family and its pretty much normal, and a lot of them use those sites as well... but if someone my age joins and doesn't play it off as "I'm just joining this b/c my friend did or something lol," its not really accepted as a cool thing to do.  Same goes for Second Life, where there is as much of a "dating" component as gameplay... and I can't speak for everyone, but where I come from, dating and having sex in a video game isn't something to brag about really.

I believe this is the case, and combined with the fact that everyone online on SL is coming from somewhere else around the world, where moral and ethical standards differ, I think people should be more tolerant of this kind of thing.  And chances are, even if someone really is only 16 and not looking as cool as your avatar at the moment, they probably DO know more than you about computers if you're 40.  Having been addicted to Second Life for 4 years, believe it or not, doesn't make you good at computers even if you learned how to use $20 worth of what Photoshop can do to edit a picture of your avatar.  If a 16 year old decides to get into SL and improve their avatar, I give them a week to a month (depending on how they network) to look better than you.  Two weeks later you forget about them and IM their hawt avatar saying they are sexy and they remember you and tell you you can suck a big one.  Then you realize they have more friends than you at YOUR infohub... which will inevitable lead to your threats of quitting SL and losing more friends who aren't feeling your bipolarness and your dramatic ways.

Side note:  Putting "no drama" in your profile doesn't mean shit.  It takes two people to make drama and if you're involved in it, you're just as much to blame--if not more, since you have a comment about it in your profile now.

I know you're talking about me and I DONT LIKE IT

I have had a few people now question me about my blog posts--or just go ahead and assume--that I must be referring to them personally.  To everyone who thinks this: I think you are completely missing the punchline/moral of my posts.  Just because I'm standing near you and one or all of my posts about my stereotypes fits you, does not I was intrigued enough by you to devote 10 minutes to writing about it.

Furthermore, just because you're wearing a curio skin or gothicatz costume or sell shapes and template clothing doesn't mean I have something against you.  As a matter of fact, I think curio makes one of the best skins in SL... but so do 90% of the females who get to the point of spending money on Second Life--and yes that includes you, emo-hipster wannabe curio-wearer with a "unique" shape... and the extent of "unique" being: farset, squinty eyes and broad but tiny nose with massive lips. LOL.. got a little of topic there!

Anyway... I just wanted to clear that up.  The point of my blog is for me to be able to vent, and I exaggerate my opinion in an attempt to make it comical.  No post is aimed at a single person; my goal is to knock people down who are too high on themselves about something that really isn't that impressive.  You don't see me bragging about looking better than everyone! (except in that one post... but that doesn't count).   Maybe I'm a hypocrite.  Maybe I'll get naked at an infohub so people will YELL at me and tell me how I am probably 12 and probably had a rough life as a child and dropped out of school.... because its so freaking absurd that a sane human being would EVER THINK of taking all their clothes on a video game, if only to interrupt the current local topic of pixel weddings and prim babies.  And yes, video game.  I know you can talk.... yeah, I know.. interact.... uh huh... you can do that on World of Warcraft too... and pretty much every other video game...

Oh btw.. I'm quitting SL.

I'm not quitting and neither are you.

There are so many things in SL that intrigue me.  Intrigue is probably too dramatic of a word considering the topic at hand...  I think it's funny how often people threaten to quit Second Life every time they are in a bad mood, there is a minor disagreement, someone talks behind their back, etc (so basically everyday).

All the cool people do it; so hip right now.  If you want to try it yourself, here is a template you can use whenever someone [or something] makes you feel like you're not in the pixel spotlight.

You: "Umm, just thought you should know, I'm quitting SL."

PPL: "Why?"

You: "Im just sick of the drama. [insert overly dramatic explanation of what just happened]"

*next day*

(Log back in and use excuse that you are starting fresh and make some drastic claims about deleting your whole friends list and/or some folders of shoes)

The cool thing is you can reuse this everyday.... anytime someone says something you disagree with.

U have teh sexy voice! WA WA WEE WA

You can never really tell who is hot or not just by their avatar, but once you hear their sweet, sultry voice, you know they have to be hot.  Because everyone with a hot voice is hot in RL according to this guy wearing a gothicatz costume, and he was from New Zealand so he would probably know something like that for sure.

Usually I hear girls comment on guys' voices as being sexy when they are deep and groggy-sounding.  So maybe this means they look like Vin Diesel in real life?....  I'm gonna go out on a really short limb and argue that he probably doesn't.  I've researched this subject for a few years and believe it or not, the only valid assumption one can make about a deep voice is that they dude has probably been sitting in front of his computer (just like you!) for days and hasn't lost the morning grogginess that he woke up with 4 days ago when he first logged on.  I can't officially comment for girls, but for me, my voice gets deeper if I've been vegetated in my computer chair for a good length of time, and that kind of lifestyle makes it hard to look sexy in RL.  But honestly it's not really a huge deal because gothicatz is always around the corner, whipping up new costumes--and if you're lucky, maybe you will show up to the infohub wearing the newest one first and everyone can admire it for 5 minutes before they go buy it themselves.

I haven't noticed much of a trend for female voices. I have seen sexy voices on RL ugly people and vice versa, more often than not.  I will say this (to the guys), don't let yourself be tricked by a super cute voice.  Sure you have seen a real life picture, but somehow... some way... I'm almost positive that I've seen that picture on myspace before--or at least it was pretty similar: face drowned out by bright light and camera angle that makes 250lb people look 100lbs.

I'll share a secret with you (you're welcome):  When you see a picture of someone with a bright light on their face, it hides any type of blemishes and slims the face--sometimes quite drastically depending on the picture and shadowing.  Another thing to watch out for are bright, unrealistic colors. This is a sign of another common way of "quick photoshopping" a picture: boosting constrast/saturation.  It makes skies bluer, skin tanner, and pock marks invisible!  If you notice any of these things, I'm not saying it is a given that the girl must be ugly, I'm just saying be careful.

Last but not least, I would like to officially announce that people who eat and slurp their drinks on mic are disgusting.  No, I'm not "giving you a hard time," I am dead serious.  I think this is something that you should be able to report and result in a permanent ban.  Maybe that's a little extreme... or maybe hearing you smack that macaroni and choke that corndog down your throat in HD sound quality is more repulsive to me than seeing a naked avatar in a PG sim.  Do everyone a favor and turn off your mic.  NOTHING is so important to talk about on SL that you can't take a 5-minute break to eat or slurp your coffee.  Of course this is just my opinion, but I think this should officially be made into a reportable offense.

Emo hair & gothicatz costumes

One of my ultimate pleasures on SL is responding to angsty IM's by Curio/Friday wearers.  You can find them at your local emo store (buried).

Expected IM scenario:

Bitch: "Umm. Who are you. Do I like know you?"

Guy: "lol I guess not, I don't come here often.  Anyway, how are you :)"

Raw dude IM scenario:

Bitch: "Umm. Who are you. Do I like know you?"

Jay: "What kind of question is that.. I'm just a nigga fixin' to buy me some emo hairs."

Bitch: (Is typing...) -- (not typing) -- (Is typing...)

Jay: **X's out window**

I'm definitely not a fan of people who are cocky in SL because of their avatars.  You can troll me all day and talk about my mother and how I'm probably 12 years old and probably didn't have any friends in school, but nothing pisses me off than an over-inflated ego.  Coincidentally these type of people always look the same and are easy to avoid, which is why I like to hang out in an infohub where the curio skins and friday hairs are less commonly seen, and the trolls flow like wine: Moose Beach Infohub.

However, today when I was standing in the middle of everyone spamming fart noises, I had an epiphany.  I  was camming in circles around my avatar with the others blurred into one boring backdrop when I realized,  I am better than these people avatar-wise [probably].  I even considered teleporting to curio in hopes of finding a new bootylicious skin for guys. But seriously, my avatar looks like some badass baller out of a new Grand Theft Auto game thats not even out yet for xbox 360.... and these other people look like they came from nintendo 64.  Forget the fact they are all wearing gothicatz costumes and roid-monkey guido skins, every shape in the vicinity is hella bobo!  I understand you want to look manly and strong, but its hard not to notice that when you slide the muscles level up to 100, it wacks out your body and makes you look like a beefcake troll.  Thats just a start on the problem though.  And btw, if anyone from Moose Beach is reading this, no, I'm not talking about you... I'm referring to everyone else in gothicatz costumes only... ye...yeah... yeah I know you have other outfits too... ok great. BAI~*